And I just had to live
And I want to give
I'm completely positive..."
(Im coming out-Diana Ross)
Up until last year, you would rarely Ever see me wearing shorts or a skirt, let alone a swimsuit. See, growing up I was teased because of my size. Aside from being called the usual- "skinny" - I had consistently been called "Underweight", "Fragile", "Frail" , "Tiny"... by strangers, family members and peers of all ages. It was often that others would offer to take me to their grandma's house so she could feed me, publicly ask if Ihad an illness or how much I weighed followed by an unrealistic weight or say "Yo' Skinny Ass..." when referring to me in conversation. All things that made me feel less than, unworthy...and not enough. I've never understood why such sayings were deemed or justified as compliments as I have often felt hurt and occasional outrage as a result.
So for many years I never felt comfortable wearing clothes that were form-fitting or exposed my skin, thinking that somehow that would hide me and keep the negative comments from occurring. That was far from the truth and the adverse effect was that by hiding I was also stifling my voice, masking my presence, and dimming my light.
I know a lot of people weren't intentionally hurting my feelings or knew that they were negatively effecting me but I also know that by leaving this unaddressed in some way I was allowing them to continue. My music journey has caused me to strive to be the best version of myself. What has continually showed up throughout the journey is that emotional trauma often goes unnoticed & unacknowledged, but with soul searching and self love, healing is achieved.
With that being said- this past weekend I "ran away" to Cancun, Mexico and I randomly ended up having a photoshoot at the beach! I'm talking about, rolling-in-the-sand, I'm-a-Victoria's- Secret-model type of shoot! lol! So, it is with Victory that I am able to DROP deeply rooted body image insecurities, POWERFULLY pose for, and CONFIDENTLY share these photos with you.
Stay tuned for more to come as I begin to share with you stories from my recent solo trips to London and Cancun. I've thoroughly enjoyed exploring the world, learning about the woman I AM and the valuable lessons I've received!! Cheers to growth!
#SolarPowered,
~Lynn
